Germs...yuck

This week I have been fighting the craziest set of illnesses! An upper respiratory infection is fairly ordinary but add to it sore throat, bloody noses and an eye infection (ewww!) and things just get weird. Thankfully I seem to be on the mend and I even got a little sassy at work when a customer was  being rude and insulting another coworker. The whole thing was made easier when he mixed a couple insults and got tripped up in the middle of yelling. Needless to say it was a short conversation after I told him there was no need to be rude just because he didn’t get his way. 😝 Hoping that the next few days I get back to 100% health and work doesn’t seem so incredibly difficult!

Feelings

This week has been so complicated with the ups and downs. I am currently in a long spiral downward that is probably common after the funeral of a close relative. I have been so blessed in that my last family funeral was 26 years ago and I am not practiced or familiar with everything that is included in losing a family member. Along that line I also didn’t realize the roles spouses play in certain situations. Mostly I feel that I have moved past the anger of my asshole ex husband leaving me like a child who gets a new toy, but on days like today where he should have had to support me and stand by me I feel those emotions rise to the surface once more and had me daydreaming about a solar flare melting his face off. I shouldn’t have to come home after a function like this to an empty house and a ton of thoughts that can never be shared. I feel devastated for my grandma. Her face just erupted with emotion when she entered to room. I snickered at some comments made by the children who were understandably confused and curious about the whole situation. Relief washed over me as a walked to my car. Disappointed crept slowly into my mind as I got home with all of these unsaid comments or hidden emotions that would only be shared with my dog. I’m gonna try and lighten the load here until I find a better medium to express myself and share my issues.